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{November 6, 2008}   Chapter seven Forget Yu JiangHu (2)

Chapter seven Forget Yu JiangHu (2)
Different from other people tall and erectly, different from the small soldier, he cares about my soul, and my slight and sensitive nerve, say tall and erectly that feels I am his child, and I am used to relying on slowly, reliance on the thought. Does not dare to imagine, if lose him one day, how is my world.
,etc. for answer,it would rather commit suicide to fear ones that pronounce moment.
Forgive me, tall and erect.
The emotion to you has never changed, can’t give you a pressure any more just, let alone see you at the pressure the agony difficult to pass have no way of choosing. In fact, you have already chosen, no?
I closed eyes, did not think everything happened.
Tall and erect, weakness of you, kind-heartedness of you, destine you can promise, can’t bear to injure me for me. Time can with indifferent all perhaps, we will afford to have speech one day perhaps, but I can’t accept.
Would rather fly scattered when being most beautiful, extinction like being unable to accept rottenly.
This is me.
Leave you, when I love you most.
Tall and erect, I understand you, to my drifting apart, I understand your desire speech is still stopped, I understand you see too we in actual life are incompatible. I understand your care of my heart, I understand you are letting me learn to grow up slowly, the society accepts. The society handles affairs and is not amazed by, learn to treat everything with the tolerant heart.
Thank for the Heaven, has let me run into you.
Think this all one’s life, anybody come into my inner world, nobody could understand once. I have been already content with one’s lot.
If can get back to the past. Just, if. The feeling debt of the previous existence, it is essential to repay this life, can not escape.
Because just idealize very much, we can not accept any setbacks.
Just love you, fear the arrival of the final result in anticipating.
Because just mind very much, a careless gesture is enough to let me have one’s face covered with tears.
Sleep piece pitch-dark, I plan to look for a job of eking out a living, people often say, the work can shift people’s attention, is wearing hair dishevelled while searching for on the net, receive a strange telephone.
A strange woman’s voice, soft, taking again some is at a loss and undoubtedly.
The ice is blue, I am a tall and erect wife, I want to see you in your city.
It is a clumsy plot, I do not understand, why does the woman always has too much unwillingness, should always tear the truth of the fact bloodily face-to-face, and I had same curiosity and unwillingness unexpectedly, wipe the face arbitrarily, put pieces of collar out of shape T shirt in, with checkpost being casual to blow top of the head angry hair-curler, hurry to a war without smoke of gunpowder joyfully. See oneself in the mirror, fairly have a radiant face, I know, I am young as the capital.
Go in coffee of island, a woman stands up leisurely, conscientious and meticulous chignon, the cashmere shirt next to the skin sets off out the graceful figure, the meticulous one held and is put, the graceful style of conversation, a kind of calm beauty, I was suddenly a bit angry to oneself, only this at one glance, I know, I fail, this is exactly the woman’s image in tall and erect mind.
Unless look at each other by on the three minute we, have language, who glimmer first,can front lines flurried,suffer defeat I finally, let to be that the spirit is originally insufficient.
The woman smiles, eyes curve the curved moon, but hide the murderous intention.
She says, I know why like you tall and erectly.
I do not believe women can be so tolerant, only say it is she that has invincible assurance, regard this as my comfort correctly.
I smile too, I know why not will not leave you tall and erectly.
Is it a kind of virtue too to dare to give up?
I put down money of coffee, leave away.
Having failed completely, the firmness revealed after it is quiet and tastefully laid out to be defeated by that. Just, I am unreconciled.
Pale face, wrote in the common diary at last:
My dear, does not know it will be the last time and call to you in this way.
I am always asking ceaselessly that ask ceaselessly, in fact you have already given the answer to me, just I would rather close eyes.
Very painful in these days, have thought a lot too.
I can accept a lot of things, but can’t accept a kind of estranged feeling. In fact I understand.
Man hold in here, nothing make, enter. I am the person surviving in one is unable uncertain. Originally cherishing very bright hope, in any case, hopeful in the bottom of heart. But now, it is isolated very much by oneself that think.
Do not want to embarrass you any more. Having understood his feeling originally at last too, you who are present were just as I who am original, uncertain and not promising, not even knowing whether to finally love the other side oneself, but not bear to let go.
Also remember what I has said? I will not love a person not loving me.
One is being formed in my heart all the time, thank you for helping me to open, while going all out, I think, I forgive him from the heart too.
In the love, it is the importance like this to offer each other confidence.
Will go to today in lifetime, only when meeting you, want to want to entrust oneself out very much very much, want to want to have a family which belongs to us very much very much, there is no a bit hesitating. I know, to you, this is a choice, can’t fail. I, but has not given you the confidence to succeed.
Yes, perhaps I am not that one is suitable for the person who becomes the wife, though I want to want to work as a good wife’s good mother very much very much.
Imagination is always bright, and reality always collapses at the first blow.
Our grief lies in, we are only the people of beauty very much, only beautiful is mostly fragile, can’t permit the flaw.
In any case, you are that an only one enter into my person in the heart of hearts, give me a period of so bright time. Once the fragile and bossiness of conniving at me how is it. I have not come round either till now, what kind of debt of feeling we last lifetime store up.

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